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Psychic Healer Rianne Collignon's blog: filled with articles about her work, her services and spiritual and holistic topics
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Dear People,

A while ago I talked to several people about the differences between approval, understanding and love. When we are kids, our parents approval equal to their love, as we receive rewards and kindness when they approve of our behavior. Understanding seems also very closely linked to care, as we seem to think that when people understand us they care and if they care, they'd understand us. Sometimes people feel that if you understand, you'd approve, but that isn't always the case.

Seeing these three as separate entities will help you receive the love people have for you, even if you don't get their approval or understanding

Approval
Approval literally means the action of approving something or the belief that something is good or acceptable. If you look back upon your own life, you might have found actions from your loved one's that you didn't approve off, while it didn't negate or diminish your love for them at all. An extreme form of disapproval for example is that we all know that people do not approve of drug use, but you need only look at how devastated families with an addict in it are to recognize that there certainly is love involved.

It's also extremely interesting to see who you feel you need approval from. If you still need your parents approval, then on some level, it almost always means that you want their love instead. Focus on why you haven't felt their love, connect to their love and you will notice your need for approval will disappear. If you want the approval of your boss, your partner or your child, you might have issues with self-confidence or self-worth.

Next time when somebody disapproves of you, notice how it affects you and recognize that you still have their love. Focus on that path you want to walk and the human being you want to be. Often people disapprove of what they conceive are risks that are too great, but that are absolutely right for the person involved. Also freely understand that when you disapprove of something, you are still able to love the person.

Understanding
Understanding literally means sympathetic awareness or tolerance. It means that you can empathize with somebody, but doesn't mean that you approve or give zero consequences. So people can understand that you are late because you overslept, but still make a note on your record.

Asking for people's understanding and then trying to force them to 'see it your way', 'to approve' or 'to prove that they care' is a losing battle. People often freely give their understanding, but still don't approve as they would have made different choices themselves. They might understand, but still be disappointed that you didn't follow through or expect you to still do what you said.

If you try to use understanding to control others, you are missing an essential point. They are still being sympathetic to you, they still show care, they are just not doing what you want based on that understanding. Accept their loving understanding and recognize that sometimes you will receive understanding and love, but not approval. Remind yourself how often you've been understanding, but still wanted consequences for the other person.

Want to talk about approval, love and understanding? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your stories or questions in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Dear People,

A lot of us know that we should keep healthy boundaries and that this will greatly improve our lives. Even so, it can be hard as we can bow down towards guilt, obligation, fear or social pressure. So today I'm writing some affirmations to help keep boundaries strong and healthy.

I write my affirmations in different levels so you can see what resonates with you and what you want to work on. You might start with a lower level that resonates and then move your way up.

Pick and choose what works for you and affirm away (I recommend three times a day if you can manage it).

I give myself the right to have boundaries
I gift myself boundaries
I gift others boundaries

I'm willing to create healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to have healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to listen to my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to protect my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to re-asses my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life

I set healthy boundaries with my boss
I set healthy boundaries with colleagues 
I set healthy boundaries with clients
I set healthy boundaries with companies/competitors
I set healthy boundaries at work

I respect the healthy boundaries of my body
I respect the healthy boundaries of my heart
I respect the healthy boundaries of my mind
I respect the healthy boundaries of my spirit
I set healthy boundaries for myself

I set healthy boundaries in my social life
I set healthy boundaries with my friends
I set healthy boundaries with my family
I set healthy boundaries with my partner
I set healthy boundaries with my children 
I set healthy boundaries with others
 
I protect my healthy boundaries
I easily protect my healthy boundaries
I joyfully protect my healthy boundaries
I give myself the freedom of healthy boundaries

Have an affirmation you want to share? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your affirmation stories in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Dear People,

A lot of people have experience with enjoying the Flow, that time when you feel strong healthy and vibrant and everything is just flowing like it should. Your focus is happy and in the moment and things just seamlessly fall into place. As a Psychic I don't only work with that type of Flow, but also with different types of energies that I also call flow. Today I'm writing to you how I do that and give you two exercises to try for yourself.

Flow of your life
Just as everybody else I always have projects, wants and needs in my life. I'm typically a planner so I like to see what I would like to do and what my goals are going to be. That allows me to be mindful, review and reflect on where my energy is going and what I'm doing with it. The more in tune I am with myself, the easier it is to be flexible, joyful and redirect what doesn't work for me.

However, I also check up on the flow of how my life is going.
Questions I often ask myself are:
  • Am I doing things in the right order?
  • Am I getting signals I should change course?
  • Am I getting signals I'm overlooking something?

For some people that can mean I suddenly 'choose to drop a subject', while for me there are obvious signals that things aren't right. I like to tell people that if you want pears, you can stand under the pear tree and shake the tree, but any pears that fall down are unripe, so it's better to wait until they are ready to let go.

Often I check the energy of the day, week or month and see what I can best do with it. It's sometimes pretty hard to let go of a project that I care about for a while, but it always turns out for the better. It's important to me that things are the 'right fit' and not just the first option or first chance.

A good example of this was when my husband was getting offers for the sale of his home. Naturally this process is very stressful, but I kept telling him the right person just hadn't showed up yet. He felt very anxious waiting, but in the end we have accepted the offer of the third person interested. It has been a blessing in so many ways, so he is now convinced that this is important.

Meeting the flow of your life is an important way to find yourself in the Flow regularly. It helps you feel what is right for you at the moment, releases you from obligation that don't work and helps you to stay flexible.

Exercise to check the flow of your life
  • Make a list of what projects you feel are important
  • Rank them in the order you think they should be done
  • Ask Spirit/The Universe/God/your intuition to rank them in which order they should flow into your life. 
  • If you have trouble with the previous step, simple use a random number generator to rank them or write them down on separate cards, shuffle and draw the order
  • What in the new order is surprising? Does it bring you any new knowledge or insights?

Flow of your body
Noticing the flow of your body - where are you at ease, where are you keeping tension, where are you looking for sustenance or for relaxation - immediately helps improve your life. A lot of people who do productivity work will try to find out at which times they are most productive and use that knowledge to optimize their schedules. There are also many books on how movement, body posture etc. can help us feel more relaxed, stronger, more motivated etc.

There are many ways to notice and work with the flow of your body and work with the energy you have or even raise it, instead of going against the flow and exhausting yourself. After you noticed what you need for your body, don't hesitate to give it to yourself.

Exercise to feel the flow of your body
  • Make sure you aren't disturbed for 5-10 minutes
  • Close your eyes
  • Breath in and out in a relaxed fashion, slowing down your breath 
  • Give each of your body parts attention, starting from the feet up towards the top of your head 
  • Listen to each part and notice if it holds tension
  • Feel how tired/thirsty/hungry your body is
  • Feel the mood of your body, is it angry, relaxed, happy, joyful or....
  • Do you notice any blockages?
  • If you have a gift to give your body - what would it be?
  • Slowly open your eyes 
  • Enjoy a bit of water, tea or something else to drink

A small list of what you might need could be:
  • Give yourself enough sleep
  • Give yourself enough food
  • Give yourself enough relaxation
  • Do some yoga
  • Take a walk 
  • Do some other exercise
  • Take a break
  • Take a holiday

My favorite ways of body flow are getting regular massages (keeps me very well connected and grounded in where I hold tension) and jumping on my trampoline whenever I get annoyed with paperwork.

Want to share an intuitive story? Post a comment on the blog, LinkedIN, Facebook Fan Page or talk to me by e-mail or in the practice!